WEEK- 48 FROM FAIR AND LOVELY TO BLACK AND BLUE

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JanPratinidhi
JanPratinidhi

WEEK- 48 FROM FAIR AND LOVELY TO BLACK AND BLUE


COLUMNS / Puchcha   /   Apr 08, 2015
Devika Seth
Devika Seth
She studied English literature and graduated from the University of Delhi. She seeks to pursue a successful career in the field of literature. She is also a trained Odissi dancer and has debuted as a poet in ‘When Cupid Struck its Arrow.’

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Wassup people!

The world cup is over. But I still seem to be hungover. Not exactly me, but my throat. I cheered so much for India in the semi-finals that my throat got completely choked. It's been so many days that I haven’t heard my own voice. Though I did not need to scream much because the stadium was already filled with 70% Indian supporters. For fillers during the lunch break, the Australian team could have arranged for games like “Spot an Aussie”. However, such big support couldn’t help India. When finally I was recovering, I went ahead to support New Zealand. And since then, I have been playing dumb charades with everyone.

And VJ has been taking the advantage of the situation. Whenever I try to make people understand what I am trying to say, she barges in and deciphers my sign language in a way I would never want. There was one time when she almost got me beaten.

Some of us from the content team had gotten out for coffee. I thought that steaming hot coffee would make my throat ease off, but VJ ensured that I get burned. News flashed on the TV that the Goa CM Laxmikant Parsekar has advised protesting nurses not to protest in the sun as they will get dark and will not be able to find bridegrooms for themselves. VJ got all pumped up to criticize the CM. Even I was trying my best to put my point through whispers. But my soul-enemy was there to ruin it all.

I was trying to say, “Politicians these days have become such vain heads that instead of white ambassadors with red lights on the roof of the car and sirens, they should be getting vanity vans. If there was a category of brainless wonders for awards, then Indian politicians would take away the most trophies. Actually, ‘brainless wonders’ should be declared a synonym for Indian politicians.”

But she conveyed it ahead as if I am agreeing with the CM and women should take care of their complexion. She was so loud that every person in the cafe could hear her. And every eye with despise was fixated on me.

A girl walked up to me and said, “I think kiddo, you have forgotten something at home. Brain. Actually I should ask you if you have heard of it at all. Because, you see, these days people like you are seldom using it and yet uttering rubbish. So please, do us a favour and stop polluting the surroundings with your cockeyed virus of casual misogyny.” And she went on and on and on. I was trying to explain her, but poor me, I couldn’t voice out what I wanted to say.

Then, I took a tissue and wrote explaining that VJ was goofing up with me. Phew! I can never be in support of such brainless wonders. But I don’t understand why a girl’s complexion or ‘gora chamda’ (to be put in Giriraj Singh’s words) is becoming a national issue? May be they have gotten bored of the same old stories of corruption, terrorism and all.

Why doesn't the government make Fair and lovely the National Cream Of India? However, unfortunately they don’t know that the foot in the mouth disease will not be cured by fair and lovely or any other fairness cream.

The truth right now is that even a fairness cream cannot brighten my future. I am not at all prepared for exams. I would do anything to skip them. But my dad is so much strict that he wouldn’t feel a hitch of tying me up at the back of any vehicle and take me to the examination centre, just like the man in a village near Mathura who wanted to ensure that his 7 year old daughter appears for maths exam.

So, if you see anyone in the same tied up situation in May, then guys it will be me.

Ciao!
 

The views expressed here are those of the authors and doesn’t reflect the official policy of Janpratinidhi. The views expressed here are those of the authors and doesn’t reflect the official policy of Janpratinidhi.
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